Sometimes I really don't know what I want. Who is real, who is fake?

Maybe it's just the point of your life when you start to question yourself why this and not that.

And I think at times, it's hard to be true to yourself or your feelings. Remember I used to say how much simpler things were back then? Yes, I still strongly feel it that way now. People and relationships were simpler and easier to handle. At least not that much of complication.

Also, I think probably I'm just being selfish. Like, you just want to have someone there when you need it. But at the same time, I guess we are all the same. Probably what sets us apart is, my tolerance level is not that high or maybe what you said is right. I just need a soul mate to be around. Cus the fact that I can acc you to shop for condoms and appear to be not a least bit affected says it all. Well, some kind of complicating thoughts here. Tell me that sex is overrated, yes it is. But...cannot live without sex is an insane statement. I'm dead serious.

I finally said out this little disappointment/thought I felt inside, you said that's ridiculous. I felt so as well. But I know this is really what I felt inside and there's no way I can change this thought/barrier. It's not about not moving on/leaving a piece of me behind/having this thought for more than half a decade. Seriously I don't know why I felt that way as well. Maybe he is the only one who can shed some light on this. Actually I have been wanting to ask/talk about this. But I reckon it's crazy for me to talk about it randomly, especially when he's out of the picture a long long time ago.

?????????????
????????????!!!!!


Anw you probably don't understand what am I talking about. Just need to rant to someone/somewhere to get this off my chest. In case you are thinking what you are thinking right now, I gotta say you are so wrong. It's not what you are thinking.

Sometimes I really don't know what I want. Who is real, who is fake?

Maybe it's just the point of your life when you start to question yourself why this and not that.

And I think at times, it's hard to be true to yourself or your feelings. Remember I used to say how much simpler things were back then? Yes, I still strongly feel it that way now. People and relationships were simpler and easier to handle. At least not that much of complication.

Also, I think probably I'm just being selfish. Like, you just want to have someone there when you need it. But at the same time, I guess we are all the same. Probably what sets us apart is, my tolerance level is not that high or maybe what you said is right. I just need a soul mate to be around. Cus the fact that I can acc you to shop for condoms and appear to be not a least bit affected says it all. Well, some kind of complicating thoughts here. Tell me that sex is overrated, yes it is. But...cannot live without sex is an insane statement. I'm dead serious.

I finally said out this little disappointment/thought I felt inside, you said that's ridiculous. I felt so as well. But I know this is really what I felt inside and there's no way I can change this thought/barrier. It's not about not moving on/leaving a piece of me behind/having this thought for more than half a decade. Seriously I don't know why I felt that way as well. Maybe he is the only one who can shed some light on this. Actually I have been wanting to ask/talk about this. But I reckon it's crazy for me to talk about it randomly, especially when he's out of the picture a long long time ago.

?????????????
????????????!!!!!


Anw you probably don't understand what am I talking about. Just need to rant to someone/somewhere to get this off my chest. In case you are thinking what you are thinking right now, I gotta say you are so wrong. It's not what you are thinking.